Tuesday, December 15, 2009

love actually, actually

oh hai! my husband's creepy friend mark who has been secretly and obsessively in love with me for god knows how long! at my home!

and you want me to lie to my husband who is right inside!

(i don't know what you're capable of...)

after making her lie to her husband, mark then shows juliet photographs of naked women...

but no ulterior motives here. he was just in the neighborhood with some notecards, a boombox, his naked lady collection, and this face. 

this has literally never been said before by anyone ever.

it's a trap!

your scent. your hair. the way you look bathed in moonlight through your bedroom window at 4am.

i want to make a suit out of your skin and wear it. forever.

then he just, like, shows her some naked dead lady.

here's the creepy part: she's into it. in loveactuallyhughgrantisprimeministerworld, these are tactics that get a man frenched by his best friend's wife in the street.

to summarize:

coercion (lies)
naked ladies
made up aphorisms
skin suits
+   dead naked ladies
street frenching

very good holiday film. A++ will watch twice a year for the next every year of my life.