Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Questionnaire a Day

Because if you love someone, you have to find out all their darkest secrets. Here is a useful tool by which to measure your potential beloved's suitability:

Questionnaire titled in Bauhaus 93

1. Your favorite pattern:


2. French women are like:


3. Describe your own scent.


4. You are trapped on a desert island following an unfortunate mishap involving a plane and a whiskey-fueled slap fight. It’s been weeks and maybe months – you can no longer tell. Hope seems a foolishness you will no longer allow yourself and you instead turn to sentiment and nostalgia, which some will say are one and the same, because some don’t quite understand the square and rectangle rule. You are resigned, maybe, but beyond your resignation and greater is your love and appreciation for the life you now know you will never return to and, certain you will die here without again gazing upon your beloved, hearing her sweet voice like honey expand like a continent over your skin, certain you will never again thank your mother or feel the warmth of your father’s pride, put your hungry lips to a bottle won by dubious, though hilarious, measures, you find a branch well pointed for a final epistle written in the sand, your last scroll. You write your parting words to the world, not so much out of hope the world will find it but rather for your own peace, because to be loved and remembered by the world is to first give love and remember. What song is in your head?


5. Fuchsia?


6. What is the purpose of climbing trees?


7. The number seven is overrated.


8. The only good ______ is a dead ________.


9. [Surveyee's name] [verbs] down the [adjective] street, [verbing] a(n) [adjective] [noun] and thinking of [Proper Noun].


10. You know s/he loves you because s/he:

 

This very scientific research instrument was created and patented by klooky, 2010. Use it however the hell you want, but don't blame anyone but yourself when you realize that no one's answers are going to be as perfect as those detailed in the post to follow.

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