Friday, September 24, 2010

movie review: He's Just Not That into You

this picture is an unalerted spoiler!

During the climax of the movie, the thesis collapses in on itself like a shoddily constructed one-room schoolhouse.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Thursday, September 16, 2010

movie review: FAST & FURIOUS

Paul Walker has not improved as an actor since Meet the Deedles.

have a nice trip!

this is a poem dedicated to a very special lady.


y fall 4 u girl?
ur eyez r like bronzed leaves;
ur skin b chillin.

Friday, September 10, 2010

confronting the possibility that i was high on idiot drugs throughout my whole childhood

i started with the trailer for young guns, a move you'll never make me regret.

from there, i made the perhaps too-obvious transition to bon jovi videos. 

then i blacked out with the sort of exquisite existential rage uniquely inspired by working in a structure that has remained bureaucratically unevolved since the middle ages and somehow ended up at the trailer for the 1992 film "from the imagination of stephen king," the lawnmower man. 

you guys, 9 year old me - the tremendous ninny - was genuinely horrified by this movie. 9 year old me also got kicked in the face by a 6th grade boy once and used to time herself saying the ABCs backwards, so i guess it stands to reason that 1992 was not my coolest year. 

27 probably will be though. which gives me one more week to get all these bon jovi videos and heartfelt expressions of love and friendship out of the way. 

i love you and count you among my daily blessings. asshole.